Black and Teal’s Official Mock Draft for the Jaguars
At this point in the offseason, it is impossible to ignore the omnipresent draft analysis that has taken over all major, minor, and worthless sports outlets alike. Why on earth would these people dwell on a topic that is 75% speculation, 25% big names, and 100% bullsh*t? Because mock drafts are nothing more than an excuse to stir the pot, start fights, and throw all of one’s support behind some 21 year old kid who has shown little more than steroid abuse or a glandular disorder.
Before we begin, allow me to introduce myself and my methods. My accolades include hair that can rival Mel Kiper’s, the charm and good looks of Mark Clayton, and oratory skills second only to Lou Holtz. These attributes, combined with years of watching football and playing Madden, clearly make me one of the most respectable and knowledgeable draft analysts the interwebz has to offer. My outlook on the draft makes Jerry Jones look like the Dalai Lama. We will draft for need, and we will fill every hole on this team with a brutal efficiency that will make even the most seasoned Thai hookers blush. And with that, Rad’s 2011 Mock Draft for the Jacksonville Jaguars will begin. Be afraid, be very afraid.
As the national media has mentioned once or twice, the Jacksonville Jaguars organization has had some issues with ticket sales in the past. Spoiled early with an unusually successful team, which reached the AFC Championship in only its second year, impatient and unrealistic fans have been hesitant in recent years to purchase tickets for fear of an average season. While I find this to be a pitiful excuse, it is clear that winning will rectify all issues that this city has with the team. And for this reason, with the 16th selection of the 2011 NFL Draft, the Jacksonville Jaguars select…