The Hof Mocks the Draft

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I’m calling it right now, 32-for-32. BOOK IT, FOOLS! Get my pickkzz after the jump…

1. A.J. Green, WR – Georgia: There are not many sure things in this draft and Carolina needs a can’t-miss injection to their offense. Cam Newton is a talented kid, but is not going to be an NFL-ready QB anytime soon. A rookie wage scale is looking likely, which means Carolina isn’t forced to pick a QB to recoup the value of the pick and contract. Green will be a long-time fixture in this offense and allow them to see what they have in Clausen.

2. Marcell Dareus, DT – Alabama: Extremely low-risk pick and the new foundation for a defense switching back to the 4-3. No brainer.

3. Cam Newton, QB – Auburn: The Bills are the least exciting sports franchise in the free world. Harvard Boy Fitzpatrick can play reasonable enough to afford Cam Cam time to figure out what he’s doing. Maybe even teach the kid some mechanical physics to help him with his game.

4. Blaine Gabbert, QB – Missouri: “So yeah, I guess Carson’s actually never coming back. Kinda wish this Gabbert kid had more on his rap sheet…kinda seems like a bit of a sissy boy, but he’ll have to do.” The Bengals offense is supposedly now run-first/West Coast (do they have an offense?), so Gabbert makes sense. But I’m putting a big ole *Bust Alert* on this guy.

5. Von Miller, OLB – Texas: “Holy crap, Von Miller fell to us!” Perfect meeting of need and BAP for the Wiz. They’ll get their QB in the second, so nothing to worry about.

6. Nick Fairley, DT – Auburn: Everyone is quick to peg Holmgren as an offensive genius, but he has no problem picking defensive players and likes the big guys early. Fairley gives them a big-time playmaker in their converted 4-3 defense.

7. Patrick Peterson, CB – LSU: In my opinion, he’s the biggest playmaker in the draft and looks to be a sure thing. Another great marriage of need and BAP – if Peterson drops to here, he can’t be skipped over again.

8. Robert Quinn, DE – UNC: Sure, they have possibly the greatest QB need in the league (maybe the Bungles or Vikings), but they should have a shot at good QB value  in the 2nd round. The Titans defense revolves around a dominant defensive line and despite looking functional at times last year, they wore down as the season progressed. Quinn is the best D-lineman left and will make a big impact across from Derrick Morgan.

9. Tyron Smith, OT – USC: Not that they weren’t already doomed by that point, but you think Tony Romo having his shoulder driven into the ground and being lost for the season made an impression? Castonzo is another option, but Smith has bigger upside and Jerry always goes for glamour.

10. Jake Locker, QB – Washington: Shanny always gets mum about who his eye’s on and he picks the players that fit his schemes – Okung was rated the better player last year, but Williams was the guy who hit his scheme. Locker has the mobility, big arm, and throw-on-the-run ability that Shanahan loves. Also, he has a “J” name and powerful two-syllable last name, just like: John Elway, Jake Plummer, Jay Cutler…ever notice how little regard Shanny had for Brian Griese and McNabb? NO COINCIDENCE.

11. J.J. Watt, DE – Wisconsin: The Texans have a lot of work to get this 3-4 running smoothly and Watt is the kind of guy the Texans need to keep adding to their roster if they’re ever gonna amount to anything – he’s not glamorous, but he’s a hard-tryin’ and powerful kid that represents very little risk.

12. Cam Jordan, DE – California: Jordan is a top-notch, polished prospect who can be extremely flexible across the D-line. He’ll be a strong compliment to RDE Jared Allen and fill the left spot very nicely. As badly as they need a quarterback, I see them being players in free agency to get a veteran quarterback to help them chase that last little bit of daylight in their roster. Chances are, they’ll fail miserably.

13. Prince Amakumara, CB – Nebraska: The Lions need to find a way to protect Stafford, but Backus has some gas left in the tank and the defense is desperate for playmakers behind the line (minus Delmas). They’re lucky to grab the Prince this late.

14. Julio Jones, WR – Alabama: Oh my lucky stars! HURRY! GET YOUR ASS UP TO THE PODIUM WITH OUR PICK! We will listen to absolutely ZERO deals for the #14 now that our boy JJ has fallen right into the spider’s web. Go directly to the podium. Do not pass GOodell. Do not collect $200.

15. Mike Pouncey, C/G – Florida: Miami’s kind of screwed, here. They’ll probably feel that it’s too early to pick from the remaining pool of quarterbacks and it’s probably too early to completely give up on Henne, either. Pouncey is another safe, big guy to add to the trenches, an area where Miami continues to stockpile talent. Sparano is an O-line guy, so he’ll be behind this one.

And now the moment you’ve all been waiting for…